While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
