Buhtt sex?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
