Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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