I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
