i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Just pee around me
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
