He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
