i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
