You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Randomize
