no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
You're like the curious george of whores
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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