I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Randomize