Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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