Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
