why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
