508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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