she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
