I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
