If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
