have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
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