he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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