U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
