His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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