Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize
