We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
He had one of those small greek statue penises
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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