I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
