He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
