ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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