sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize
