Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
People in love make me want to vomit
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Dignity is for republicans.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
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