is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
