i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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