What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
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