a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
