wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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