What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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