do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
