You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
