The brown eye won't let me do that either.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
