Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize