I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
