My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
