I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
