fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Just pee around me
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
