lets start a swedish sibling band together
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
