Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
