i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
