playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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