Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize