physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
