Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
we're so committed to being not committed
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
