I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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