At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize