Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize